The Happytime Murders

What if I told you I had a script about puppets and people co-existing in a LA hard-boiled noir comedy with Melissa McCarthy? Would that be something you might be interested in?…

I can’t help but picture the late great Martin Landau pitching this idea as his character Bob Ryan on Entourage and Ari Gold laughing in his face with some snarky comment about that idea belonging in the trash with his boy Oscar the grouch. Ari Gold, an absolute prick but spot on.

The novelty of puppets and humans working together to solve LA murders lasts for about two minutes and then reality sets in and you quickly realize there’s still another hour and a half of this crap to go.

It’s a gimmick film that gleams the 1940s type of noir detective flick where a mysterious and beautiful puppet hops into P.I. Phil Philips office with a tale of woe and secrecy, which is quickly followed by a rash of puppet murders and gores of stuffed cotton strewn from crime scene to crime scene.

I believe the film was trying to be self-deprecating but I couldn’t really tell at times and most importantly it wasn’t all that fun. No doubt the filmmakers had their eye on establishing Phillips as a Jake Gittes (Chinatown) type of character mixed in with the underground smut world of 8mm but you can only go so far with entertaining puppet porn.

Wow…. Did I really just write that?

What puppets do in the dark had its moments of comedy as bodily fluids are routinely used as a quick gag but the payoffs grew tiresome. The cracked out and drug addicted puppets they encounter became mundane, the plot dragged on and even the comedic genius that is Melissa McCarthy looked bored and uninspired.

It was like watching a bad student film… for a hour and a half .  I’d be pissed if I actually spent money to watch this film so be advised, save the cash and go watch Youtube clips of kids with sock-puppets.  

The Happytime Murders easily makes the cut as worst films of the year.